painted a short note on canvas.

last night i painted a short note on canvas.

the blank canvas sat on my wall for months bearing witness to the millions of dreams and hundreds of lonely nights taking place on the bed below.

i searched for paper to write him a letter.
i had thrown it all away when my thoughts seemed to team up with my inspirations and boycott.

i chose the canvas.
orange peel and cherry cobbler colors would bring it to life.

i painted the last kiss.
somehow this paint would need to explain how our lips seems to fit perfectly together.
there would be no footnotes to explain how we felt.
no similes could give the true feeling.
I kept painting.

I needed whoever read this painting to read:

---
biddi...

this is you.
yesterday.today.tomorrow.

I will gladly drive 9 hours
to spend a few minutes with you again.

this is us.
---

I kept painting in an attempt to not appear lazy.

love has become a lost art because most of the painters are lazy.

I painted all night.

so yeah...
last night I painted a short note on canvas.

played in the rain.

so last night i played in the rain - with biddi.

atlanta had gotten to be too much
so for a few days, he said, he wanted to check me out.

the weekend had been spent with sheets covering what's important
and every so often we'd put on backpacks and move among the millions
in manhattan's union square - 5th ave - canal street - chelsea.

monday morning he'd leave as though he had never come
and for what could be months we'd both be semi-single again
and that life wasn't designed with me in mind
so under covers and over bowls of captain crunch and lucky charms i begged him to stay.

he couldn't so we broke the hours into seconds so it'd seem like we had longer.
in those seconds we made as much love as possible, creating pleasant smells on my new mattress, and new focal points on each each.

we left the window open, and turned the heat up high
because we both love to sweat.

we listened to etta james and tweet
and tried to seperate the tears from the beads of perspiration.

the tears never made it to my chin.
they fell into his.

i begged him to stay longer.
he couldn't.

sunday night we sang on trains
and danced in streets.
the walked close to skyscrapers - me behind him
hoping the rain would be considerate and go around us.

the streets found themselves empty
but no longer thirsty.
i presented biddi with arms around his waist and lips to his neck - then ear.

he squeezed my hands back and we stood under the scaffold watching the new rain introduce itself to the old.

i released him from my arms and ran into the rain laughing.
i refused, this time, to let the tears and sadness show.

he joined me
and we kissed at the corner of WALK and DON'T WALK

he promised to return soon
and i laughed louder and longer as the rain ran down my face.

so last night i played in the rain - with biddi